Most students are well-behaved in their lessons, but sometimes we see minor disruptive behaviours such as asking irrelevant questions, telling stories, talking over you, playing when you're talking, and moaning and groaning. One of the most influential and least disruptive methods to address these behaviours is giving a simple non-verbal cue. For example, if you put a finger to your lips, most students know to stop talking. With a simple verbal cue like "hands on heads", you can be reasonably confident that students understand this is a call for attention.

However, a descriptive cue may be needed. When giving a direction, it's imperative that you are assertive and calm. For example, if a student is playing or singing while you're talking, you might say:

Pauline, you are playing while I'm talking to you. You need to be listening.

This descriptive cue raises the student's behaviour awareness, i.e. it tells the student exactly what they're doing and exactly what they should be doing. We don't ask the student, "What are you doing?" or "Are you talking while I'm talking?" because we know the answers to these questions and asking them achieves nothing. We don't say, "Stop talking" because we need to teach the student what behaviour they should be demonstrating. Besides, talking is only one non-listening behaviour.

Most students understand that it's rude to play while the teacher is talking and will respond well to the suggestion. However, following a descriptive cue with a direct question can also be effective. Such questions should never be open, such as "Why are you doing that?"

Pauline, you are playing while I'm talking to you, what should you be doing?

There's one answer: "Listening."

However, directing behaviour by suggestion only works when students understand what is expected of them, know how to do it, and are ready to comply. Until we have evidence from the student, we can't assume they know what to do. When a descriptive cue alone doesn't work, it's clear that the student needs to be taught what the desired behaviour looks like. Bennett (2021) argues that "One of the first things teachers must do is explicitly and clearly communicate what behaviour is expected" (p. 27). This is probably more important in the classroom, but, you might, in fact, choose to establish some rules at a student's first lesson.

We can teach the desired behaviour with a simple direction.

Pauline, show me you're listening by putting your hands in your lap, facing me, and waiting until I invite you before you speak or play/sing again.

Don't repeat the direction over and over; say it once, wait, then direct your eyes back to the task and continue. This signals that your direction is expectant and not optional; this is reinforced by the absence of "please"—it's not a request, it's not optional, it's a direction. The language is also positive and directs the student to the desired behaviour—as opposed to telling the student what they shouldn't be doing ("stop", "don't", etc). This direction teaches the student what to do while the teacher is talking—it teaches what listening looks like. You can expect that the student will continue playing while you're talking, whether it happens in the same lesson or subsequent lessons. But they now know what your expectations are and should only need prompting in subsequent instances:

Pauline, hands in your lap, eyes this way, mouth closed.

or, ultimately:

Pauline, listening.

What if the student presents a silly argument, for example, that they're listening at the same time as playing? We need to avoid unnecessary confrontation as our directions are not open to negotiation: we don't argue, and we don't test the student's listening to make a point (in this example). We need to ignore all that is secondary: arguing, huffing and puffing, complaining, groaning, folding arms, etc. Simply repeat the direction assertively and calmly and use the same language. Behaviour has to be taught; it's difficult to learn something if the instruction is constantly changing. Although you could add, "I'm waiting" and wait. Don't speak, don't repeat, just wait. Don't be afraid of silence.

In some circumstances, it's effective not to enter into an argument but to agree with the student's argument partially. For example:

Teacher: But mum let's leave my violin on the floor."

Student: That may be true, and I'll discuss that with mum later; until then, [repeat direction].

A brief tangential note. A common protest from students goes something like:

But my last teacher didn't make me do that!

When students raise these kinds of issues, it's very important that we maintain professionalism. To say, in this example, "I'm your teacher now" is argumentative, even childish. Worse still are comments disparaging the student's previous teacher; for example:

Your last teacher obviously didn't really know what they're talking about; that's why I'm the teacher now.

Instead, invite the student to demonstrate or describe how their teacher asked them to practise as this validates the student; it shows that we value their input, respect their relationship with their previous teacher, and acknowledge their prior learning experiences, which we need to build upon, not tear down. When they finish demonstrating or describing, you can gently say:

Oh, that's interesting. Tell me more/show me how. ... That's a good way of doing things. Let me show you another good way because two good ways is better than one!

This statement is forward-looking and focuses on what matters most: learning.

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In the next lesson, you'll learn what to say when suggestions don't work.